A real gem from the basement (of the author's parents)....

Case of the Howling Horse II
By Steve, circa 1985-86
(A special thanks to Andy, brother of the author, for the transcription).

One day Steve, Peter, Matt, and Mike were walking to Steve’s house when Mike heard something. Pete saw something. Mike heard a howle. Pete saw a horse. Then Steve had an idea. It was a howling horse. Steve was right. Matt, who had shut up said lets chase it. Steve got into his vector. Mike jumped into his Porshe 940 turbo. Matt got into his shmused VW bug. Pete took the wheel of another vector. The horse sped of with the kids in hot prisuit, going at 157mpg. That is everyone but Matt who was going at 89. We stoped at the closest Mini-Mart to get gas. Matt showed up half an hour later. Matt got a 4 mile head start, now going 180. Pretty soon the others took off at 215. They easily caught up with Matt. Hey! yelled Steve who was in the lead. We chased the horse from Conneticut through Wisconson to Arizona! Where’s Matt? asked Peter. I Dunno said Mike. There he is said Steve with his radar and raidios on full power. 50 miles behind us. Right said Pete and Mike. Jinx said Mike. I don’t belive in that stuff said Pete. I do! said Mike. Everyone had radars and radios. Way back there, Matt yelled Tubojets on! and sped up to 250. He caught up with us in a half hour. I need gas said Matt. No wonder said Mike. Shut up said Matt. I don’t want to said Mike. Burnt! thought Pete. Then the horse came in sight. Full power (which was 300) yelled Steve Matt went 290. The horse when 301. Dar said Steve. Were going through nebraska again said Matt Duhy said Pete. Where is he? asked Mike. In South Dakota, Kansas, Wyoming, Missouri, or Iowa said Steve, who knew his states and which ones were next to them. Which was did he go, Pete North-East said Pete. Leave a sign that tells which way we went said Mike. Good idea said Pete. Lets go said Steve. O.K. Hey! the horse took the route back to Wiscanson. said Pete. Well, lets go suggested Mike. Here’s Matt said Steve. YO Matt! yelled Steve. Would you please keep up with us, at least! yelled Pete. I’ll try replied Matt. The horse took Route 68 to Minniesota said Mike. He ran out of gas! They all said. lets catch him said Matt. Fine with me said Pete. Poof! went something. Poof it went again, but not as loud this Time. lets follow the noises said Steve. Lets go. O.K. It’s coming from Lake SuperROIR. Who cares about that. said Mike. Lets follow the horse. Good idea. Their it goes. Chase it until it runs out of gas! Yeah! It’s going back to Conneticut. Follow it! Vroomm Vroomm. Hey MOOOing cow! yelled! Mike. Can you help us. No, sorry said the cow. O.K. said Mike. Of we go! caught him. Stick ‘em up. Hey! your Josh Sayward, and that’s the world famous 200mmobile that was stolen on tomorrowday! get the police, Matt. There they are. Your under arrest, Josh Sayward. O.K. Boys since Josh Sayward was on the wanted list here is $1,000 for each of you. Thanks! lets go home. Ummmm Mike! Here’s the map that I made at the Mini Mart. said Steve. Want it? Nah. O.K. Do you want it Matt or Pete? No. The end.


THE END.

It is a shame we didn't scan the map that accompanies this story, as it shows where the crew encountered volcanoes and gunshots during their adventure. Apparently this wasn't as memorable as the speeds at which they drove, so the incidents much have been edited out at the author's discretion.